I walked a mile in my shoes today

Today I did what I thought I couldn't.  Instead of going straight home to sit on the couch, I left work on time and went to the park.  With a friend we started around.  We joked and laughed while swapping stories of how we got to where we are.  He had promised me we would stop when needed, that he wouldn't push me too hard, too fast.  

The park we went to was close to work, with a walking path surrounding a couple of baseball fields and meanders next to a small lake.  Not a lot of trees but it was cloudy today so the 100 degree heat didn't feel too bad.  I started out very confident, smiling and ready.  Within the first seven minutes, that all disappeared.  My leg pain flared up and bit me in the ass and my thigh felt like someone was stabbing me.  At that time, I was ready to quit.  Time to turnaround and go home.  So did I?

Hell no.  I focused on what was ahead of me.  No, not the path.   What was in front of me was the future.  In my future, I do not wear clothes from any store for "Big & Tall".  In my future I have to make time for TV because normally I spend too much time outside.  In my future, I don't have a spare bedroom, I have kid's bedrooms.  In my future, people describe me as that guy with the dark hair, not "The big guy".  

That got me through another seven minutes.  At this point, we're halfway done and have just turned next to the lake.  Now I was experiencing pain beyond measure from my ankles to my shoulders (why do my neck and shoulders hurt from walking?)  I asked to quit and was told "Yes".  Little did I know that that only meant we now had to walk all the way back to the truck.  Now, I know what you must be thinking, "He's been walking for 15 minutes, what a loser."  And you know what, you're half right, I am a loser, of old habits and this excess weight.   For the past 10 years, my job has been confined to an office chair.  For the past 10 years, I have gone from home to work to home, etc etc.  Now I am retraining myself; I am learning what I can do, and what I should do.  

Where was I?  Oh yeah, the lake and half a mile from salvation.  Did I mention that the lake is a breeding ground for several species of waterfowl?  Yep, ducks, geese, swans and other unidentified swimming birds.  The reason I mention this is that path next to the lake is littered with...scat.  Have you ever tried to think about your pain while dodging a thousand piles of poo?   Before I knew it, we had crossed half way and the truck was the finish line.  

We left the path and cut across a small wooded area and this was the worst part, for a split second I thought about quitting, "Someone can come get me" but there is something in me that won't allow it which I'll touch on in subsequent posts.  I would not let myself stop, I would not let myself be another failure.  I did it.  I finished, walking for a full 26 minutes, at what I would consider a "brisk pace".  My face was red, I was sweaty, I could feel my heart-rate increase.  That's exercise and I'll take it.  

What did I learn?  I learned that my pain can be ignored.  I learned that I can push past my own self-imposed limits.  I learned that I won't die from walking an ungodly distance for fun.  I am going to be doing this daily; rearranging my work calendar to ensure I can take off every evening with enough time to get in a walk before driving home.  If I wait til I get home, there is a greater chance, almost guaranteed, that I won't do it.  I'm excited for myself and what this means for my future.  Let's see what else happens when I don't tell myself I can't do it!!!

For tracking purposes, I counted my meals again today and have consumed about 2,100 calories, a record I believe.  Instead of the normal tracker, below is a breakdown of how much of my daily consumption each item was.  This is a great view because it lists the food.  Can you believe I ate all this today and it was still barely two thousand calories?  I'm totally psyched and cannot wait until tomorrow when I get to do it all over again.  Thank you for joining me.  Follow the blog if you're as interested as me to see how far I can go.