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Tuesday, May 15, 2012

REMIX

By popular demand and a dose of good sense, I have changed the name of my blog from "The New Me" to "Too Big To Fail".  This means a lot more to me because it doesn't reflect that I'm done, but reminds me of where I'm going.  Since even if I mess up one day or one week, it doesn't mean I've failed, just that I need to get back on track.

Something bugging me right now is blisters, and it's hard to even stand on them, let alone walk but when I look back in my blog files from last year, the same thing happened:  blisters the first week, awesome the second.

To celebrate this new direction and positive attitude, I'm going to present you with the transcript of a recent therapy session.  This is called the Eliza Test and is available at http://chayden.net/eliza/Eliza.html  It's a computer program designed to mimic a Rogerian therapist by using natural language.  I go to this site whenever I'm feeling blue or melancholy and it never fails to either make me laugh or feel better.
>> Hello.
How do you do.  Please state your problem.
>> I'm having trouble staying motivated.
Is it because you are having trouble staying motivated  that you came to me ?
>> yes.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> I am.
How long have you been  ?
>> How long have I been what, positive?
Why do you ask ?
>> cause you confused me.
Why do you think I confused you ?
>> cause i'm confused.
Do you believe it is normal to be confused  ?
>> sometimes.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> welcome to the club.
Please go on.
>> you confused me, i confused you, we're even.
You like to think I confused you -- don't you ?
>> only when it's true.
Does that question interest you ?
>> no?
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> yes
You are sure.
>> no
You are being a bit negative.
>> ok, I'm sorry.
Do you enjoy being sorry  ?
>> NO!
Why not ?
>> cause I'm not.
Is it because you are not  that you came to me ?
>> No, I came to you for motivational help.
Why 'no' ?
>> cause it's not why
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> Why do I hate the things I do yet do them anyway?
Are such questions much on your mind ?
>> all the time
What does that suggest to you ?
>> that I need direction, a higher purpose
What would it mean to you if you got direction  ?
>> That I would be able to go somewhere
You say that you would be able to go somewhere  ?
>> yes, i want to be somebody.
I see.
>> I want people to be proud of me and not ashamed
Why do you want people to be proud of you and not ashamed  ?
>> doesn't everybody?
Realy, everybody ?
>> most people.
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> why not
What answer would please you most ?
>> "I love you"
Perhaps in your fantasies we love each other.
>> perhaps.
You don't seem quite certain.
>> neither do you
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> I think we were discussing us
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> forget it.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> again, welcome
Please go on.
>> I think we're done
Do you say you think we're done  for some special reason ?
>> cause you don't understand me
What makes you think I don't understand you ?
>> you said it
Oh, I said it  ?
>> yes
I understand.
>> thank fully
What does that suggest to you ?
>> that you understand?
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> am I
Do you believe you are  ?
>> no
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> no
You are being a bit negative.
>> no
Why not ?
>> cause i'm answering your bloody questions!
How long have you been answering my bloody questions  ?
>> days it seems
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> ok, for real we're done.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> who's on first?
Please go on.



3 comments:

  1. I'm never ashamed of you, just FYI. Just the fact you are brave enough to pick this up again, and to post so openly makes me so proud of you. Take it one day at a time and keep those short and long term goals in mind. We love ya.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think your an awesome inspiration to many people. When i see you i see you heart and how big it is. Your smile lights up the room. I truly see how loving and strong you are. With God we can do anything. :)

    ReplyDelete

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